In years gone by, Christmas on the beach in Australia has become almost an international institution. Just about everyone has heard the debaucherous tales of sitting on the beach with enough alcohol to destroy even the sturdiest liver, bellowing “Five Go-old Rings!” as loud as possible. Previous years have seen all-in sumo contests, gigantic congas, and nude carol singing, which have all been jolly good fun unless you’re a policeman or a lifeguard.
After all, one thing that isn’t quite as much fun is the amount of people who nearly drown. Lots of beer, combined with scorching sun, can go to people’s heads, and they think it’s a good idea to go for a leak with huge waves crashing over them and dangerous currents trying to take them to New Zealand. In 2003, on Christmas Day alone, 114 people had to be dragged out of the sea by lifeguards, and last year a crackdown was enforced. Security guards are now in place to stop people bringing any alcohol on to Bondi, Bronte or Tamarama Beach in Sydney, and people are being encouraged to go and do their drinking in licensed areas.
The drinking bans apply to most beaches in Sydney, Melbourne and Perth, and at the risk of sounding like a Daily Mail-reading sourpuss, it is for a good reason. If you do insist on trying it, then be it on your head. It’s technically illegal, but it’s far less rigorously enforced in the places that are less obvious choices.
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